what to do what to do

I am stuck at a crossroads. Sitting here waiting and not sure what to do, and what is even harder, is that I've lost the urge to find a different job. It is just so depressing when you apply everywhere, and then you never get anything back. I've been watching a lot of you tube, specifically the 5awesomegays channel, and it has kinda got me ready to not be such a pussy, to not be so shy. To be able to make something of myself regardless of what is going on in my personal life. I am really lonely, and it seems like it is getting worse day by day, i know i have people, and i know that Shane and i are doing fine, it is just really hard because I feel like I have no one to talk to, which again i know i do and i know that i am supposed to talk to Shane, i just a) haven't had much to say or b) he gets tired of hearing me complain so i feel like he isn't there for me 100%, and I am going to sidetrack for a second, I am considering getting a t-mobile G1, because it is a pretty nice phone, but i was just reading this article and here is part of the intro on the person that wrote it "Having bought more than 15 cellphones over the last 2 years, some might consider her (the reviewer) a cellphone addict, but others, like us, believe that she can compare the value of a cellphone to the user much better than most of us and her opinion on a new cell phone certainly carries weight" WTF!!! since Early November of 2006 I have had 4 blackberry pearls, a juke, an enV, a palm centro, a glyde, a voyager, an iphone, 2 rizrs, 3 sidekick 3's, a sidekick lx, a sony ericsson TM506, a nokia 5310, a blackberry curve, a lg rumor, and there are probably more, and i have spent well over $3000 on phones, but i cant even get a job at a fucking cell phone company, WTF! i guess this even ties together because, i am too shy and have a really hard time in interviews regardless of the job. I don't know what to do with school, i know that i need to go, but with proposition 8 passing, which don't even get me started on that, Shane wants to move, because there is a possibility our marriage is going to be null and void, but sorry, I am not moving again, not until i have my 60 credits. 

now that i am done venting at the moment, maybe more later.